17 Things To Do When You Get Bored In Your Relationship, Recommended by Experts

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15. No, But Really: Find Something Exciting To Do

Like Bradshaw, Kia Grant, Lovapp’s relationship correspondant, tells Bustle that you must, above all, do new, exciting, interesting things with your partner. “Find new exciting things you haven’t done before,” she says. “Could be rock climbing, zip-lining, etc.” The activity doesn’t matter — and if you’re in need of some ideas, see No. 14 on this list for tons of options. The point is, do something different. What it is specifically is not important — that part “just depends on what the two people in the relationship are interested in and find fun,” Grant says. And if you always do the same kinds of things together, sign up for that pottery class or running club. You never know what might happen — and at very least, you’ll have a nice vase or a newfound love for running at the end of it.

16. Explore Mutual Interests

Yes, it’s fun to find totally new and zany ways to pass the time, but don’t forget to do lots of things together that you both love, dating expert Noah Van Hochman tells Bustle. “If you are both outdoors enthusiasts, you may find clubs that cater to things you both might want to try, such as rock climbing or kayaking,” he says. “If you are both a bit more intellectually oriented, then visiting some museums or taking in a lecture series could be just right for you.” And even though activities are vital, don’t just do, do, do without any thoughtful gestures. “Whatever your interests are,” he says, “you can also spice it up with romantic gestures along the way just keep a good balance.” So buy your partner a rose, or get your partner a little gift on the way home.

17. Acknowledge That Boredom Is Normal

The preceding 16 suggestions have all been about changing things up, shaking yourself out of a daily grind, and the like. But it’s also necessary to realize that boredom is totally normal in the average relationship, relationship coach and therapist Anita Chlipala tells Bustle. So don’t panic. “A little effort can get a couple out of that rut,” Chlipala says.

Just acknowledge that you’re not the only ones in the world who have experienced a rut in the first place. “Doing novel, challenging and exciting things with your partner can invigorate passion,” she says. “Couples who do novel and exciting activities report higher levels of relationship satisfaction.” Once you are OK with the fact that boredom will float in and out from time to time, you can address your yawns and find a fun way to do something new.

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